What Does It Mean to Be an Empath-100% Astonishing, If You Are Trained

What Does It Mean to Be an Empath?

What does it mean to be an empath? To answer the question accurately, I divide humans into two broad groups: empaths and non-empaths.

I divide each of these groups into two more groups, trained and untrained. These relationships form a Venn diagram like this:

Non-empaths can learn to become empaths, and empaths can learn to control and contain their empathy. Interestingly, the same training works for both groups. What it means to be an empath depends on whether the empath is trained or not. The difference is striking. For the untrained empath, life may be difficult. For the trained empath, life is about service to others.

Empathy and Empath

Empathy differs from being an empath. Empathy occurs when you imagine what it’s like to be in another person’s circumstances and meet them from that place. Empathy is a poor substitute for empathic training and is how most non-empaths respond to other’s emotions.

Common Descriptions of What It Means to Be an Untrained Empath

Empathic sensitivity seems to fall along a continuum. For example, at one end of the continuum, an empath might describe life like this:

Imagine feeling every emotion on the spectrum every day from intense grief to anger, to sadness, to hopelessness, to excitement, to gratitude, to happiness, etc. It causes extreme unexplainable mood swings. An empath does not realize she is feeling the emotions of another. The feelings seem like they are her own feelings. She cannot tell when she is feeling someone else’s emotions or her own.

These empaths are intense and emotional. Some of these empaths obsess over fixing people, especially broken or mentally ill ones. They feel like they have no control over their empathic nature.

They may make untrained non-empath very uncomfortable. Often, empaths see past the fake mask or the wall that people are hiding behind and force them to recognize their true self. Non-empaths may find this empath very scary.

These empaths share many everyday experiences:

• They usually hate crowded places, especially malls or shopping.
• They hate TV and movies, especially violence
• They absolutely cannot stand cruelty on any level.
• They cannot be around fake or harmful people.
• They may suffer from a close friend’s emotions in another state without warning.
• They may know if something will work out or not.

These empaths often feel the pain of others very acutely to the point that they can become easily overwhelmed, drained, and exhausted. Because of this, they often need time alone and/or time outdoors to recharge.

They frequently have a difficult time watching the news or anything with violence, and many seek higher spiritual truth. Empaths may find themselves feeling very isolated and as if they never really belong.

This is a standard description of an untrained empath. She would define what it means to be an empath as suffering through life feeling emotions that do not belong to her. She has not learned how to discern her own emotions from those of others. Her life may be chaotic and exhausting.

On the other hand, a properly contained, educated, and skilled empath has led many to become exceptional entrepreneurs, psychologists, social workers, police officers, FBI agents, educators, scientists, and more.

What It Means to Be a Trained Empath

I’m talking about true empaths here, not non-empaths trained to be empathic.

For trained empaths, what it means to be an empath is to serve others with understanding and compassion. The trained empath discerns between her feelings and the feelings of others. She has complete control of herself without shutting down.

She still prefers being alone and avoids crowds. And she definitely hates violence and cruelty of any kind. However, the harshness of the world does not overwhelm her.

She listens and reflects. She brings peace to places of conflict. Her inner strength and integrity is obvious to anyone spending time with her. If she has children, they learn emotional competency from her.

She is in a loving, emotionally stable relationship with her partner. That is not to say that there is no upset in her family because there is occasional upset. The upset does not turn into toxicity. It’s the difference between passing a hot knife through butter, which leaves a deep cut or passing the knife through water, which sets off a small amount of steam, leaving the water unharmed.

Trained empaths are often charismatic leaders. They know to serve their subordinates rather than be served. They are not soft, but they are not harsh either.

These empaths seek balance, beauty, and tranquility. They have a grace that seems indefinable, but clearly present. The trained empath would define what it means to be an empath as a great gift that allows her to serve others in meaningful ways.